Tag Archives: Christian

A little bit of Admin

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The method of study that I have chosen for this year’s study is called S.O.A.P. notes.  The acronym stands for:  Scripture, Observation, Application, and Prayer.  For much the same reason behind my needing to do this EVERY day for the discipline, I also need a system, otherwise, I may just end up reading a passage (whatever passage) and not doing much else with it.  My hope is to use this method as a way to “work hard so that I can present myself to God and receive his approval, to be a good worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly explains the word of truth” (2 Timothy 2:15) and, likewise, to “train myself to be godly” because “godliness is much better (that physical training) promising benefits in this life and the life to come” (1Timothy 4:7-8).

Before I begin sharing my S.O.A.P. notes, I want to let you know what books I’m using for the passages I’m using this year.

The main book is:  God’s Words of Life from the NIV Women’s Devotional Bible.  I take a verse a day from each chosen section.  If there are not enough verses to fill out the month, I draw from God’s Promises for Your Every Need.  If there was not a corresponding section, or if I did not have enough verses that weren’t duplicated, I pulled from the Topical section of openbible.info and bible.knowing-jesus.com.  Finally, the bible translation I am using – almost exclusively – is the New Living Translation because it’s the one I most enjoy reading.

Though we are not Catholic, my family typically does something in recognition of Lent, which begins – very conveniently for me and this study – on March 1st.  The subject, at least, in part, is going to be fasting.  So, as of now, March is the only month for which I do not already have a schedule.

 

Much love in Christ,  Patty

 

Long time, no see :(

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WOW!  It’s been a LONG time!  I feel like I should apologize for not posting so long but I know that’s just performance-based anxiety-guilt talking, so I won’t.  I also won’t make any lame excuses about time having gotten away from me.

Truth be told, when I started this blog, it was in a desperate attempt to bring something of value to God and to be thought something special enough to have some very desperate prayers answered.  He did answer those prayers and, immediately upon receiving my answers, my life entered a surreal tailspin.  WHY?  Well, the short answer is because God did not answer the way I wanted Him to.  He didn’t even answer the way He typically had for most of my life up until that point.

What I began to realize – with the Lord’s help – was that I had been under a pseudo-assumption that God and I had entered into a type of contract.  I say “pseudo” because, had you asked me if I believed that, I would’ve said NO.  Because, of course, that is absurd.  God wants it all, or nothing at all.  There is no contract.  No deal.  No negotiations.  No bargaining.  But prior to that one fateful day in March 2013, my life had pretty much resembled a contract.  To my mind, at least.

I did my part.  I was the obedient, good little, Bible-study-attending, never-miss-a-Sunday-or-Wednesday-service, church girl.  And God did His part and delivered me SWIFTLY – as promised – from ALL my troubles.

It was a pretty sweet deal.  Until it wasn’t.

Because, one day, He said NO.  And that no led to another no.  And that no led to another no.  Until the “no’s” were piled so deep I was beginning to wonder if I’d ever hear a “yes” again.

And just when I felt like I couldn’t possibly hear another “no,” Rejection came.  Well-meaning, good hearted, people thinking they were helping (to shake me loose from an obviously-self-imposed rut; who thought I was somehow guilty of the sins of pride and sloth; or that  I was refusing to help myself by not stepping out in faith, by trusting God) dropped my hand.

I suppose they felt like they were the only ones walking the path we were on and they were tired of carrying me or dragging my dead weight.  I don’t know exactly.

All I know is what I was told:  we simply do not have the grace to serve you and your family anymore.

BOOM!  Another no!  Only this time it came from Job’s friends and was paired with exhortations to get on with my repenting because surely I was sinning.

The damage was more than I could bear.  AND, I was mad!  My friends had hurt me and God had let them, and I couldn’t make anyone believe that the way there saw things was not how they really were.  How could I continue to attend a church where a small – but very important – group of people (people who had walked with us from the beginning but now had not grace left to extend) would now turn their backs on me?

Did I put more trust in them than I had placed in God?  The answer was obvious, given how devastated I was over something I had been certain for two years was inevitable.

People will always fail me.  And God will let it happen whenever I start to trust in men more than I trust in Him.

This is a lesson I’ve had to learn many times and, sometimes, very painfully.  And still, my first instinct is to ALWAYS try to figure things out.

It is with that in mind that I have chosen this year’s course of study.I am choosing to focus on Abba Father this year.  What He says about me.  What the Bible says about Him.  His promises to me.  And how His Love for me is based on His Goodness and not on my ability to do enough good often enough to feel worthy of that Love.

The plan I had before (the plan I had when I started) was all about me bringing something to God, hoping He’d love me.  This plan – which I’ve prayed over since before Thanksgiving – has its roots in The Father, and not in my own pride.  My goal is to draw near to God so that He will draw near to me.

I’m going to be blogging my S.O.A.P. notes for each scripture.  I will also Instagram a shot of each page (if you prefer to follow me there: @pattyh29).  I will be using the hashtags #gettingtoknowthefather and #iknowabbalovesme.

I would love for you to follow along with me and let me know your thoughts.  BUT, I’ll be here, even if you don’t.  Loving My Father and Letting the Father love me.

Blessings,  Patty

Day Sixty-One: Justice Served

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READ:  Take some times before your begin to sit in silence.  Let your thoughts settle.  Now, read the passage once silently.

ESTHER 7:3-10

(3)  Queen Esther answered, “If I have found favor in your eyes, O King, and if it please the king, give me my life, and give my people their lives.

(4)  “We’ve been sold, I and my people, to be destroyed–sold to be massacred, eliminated.  If we had just been sold into slavery, I wouldn’t even have brought it up; our troubles wouldn’t have been worth bothering the king over.”

(5)  King Xerxes exploded, “Who?  Where is he?  This is monstrous!”

(6) “An enemy.  An adversary.  This evil Haman,” said Esther.

Haman was terror-stricken before the king and queen.

(7-8) The king, raging, left his wine and stalked out into the palace garden.  Haman stood there pleading with Queen Esther for his life–he could see that the king was finished with him and that he was doomed.  As the king came back from the palace garden into the banquet hall, Haman was groveling at the couch on which Esther reclined.  The king roared out, “Will he even molest the queen while I’m just around the corner!”

When that word left the king’s mouth, all the blood drained from Haman’s face.

(9) Harbona, one of the eunuchs attending the king, spoke up:  “Look over there!  There’s the gallows that Haman had built for Mordecai, who saved the king’s life.  It’s right next to Haman’s house–seventy-five feet high!”

The king said, “Hang him on it!”

(10) So Haman was hanged on the very gallows that he had built for Mordecai.  And the king’s hot anger cooled.

THINK:  Read this story of justice being served again, this time aloud.  Listen specifically for a word or a phrase that touches your heart in some way.  When you finish reading, close your eyes.  Recall the word and sit quietly, mulling it over.  After a few minutes, write the word down.  Don’t explain it or say more about it; just note it.

PRAY:  Read the passage aloud again, this time looking for a person or an action that accentuates your internal picture of God’s justice or heightens your understanding of how he governs the world.  Perhaps it will be Haman’s response to his fate or King Xerxes’ authoritative command.  How is this depiction of God’s justice meaningful to you today?  Again sit in silence.  Briefly note what comes to you.

LIVE:  Read the text one final time.  This time, listen for what God, through the text, is inviting your to do or become.  Perhaps he is offering a new perspective on how he cares when unjust things happen to you, just at King Xerxes was outraged to discover the threat to Esther’s people.  Or maybe you sense that God is calling you to take a stand for justice in a particular situation, like Esther did.  Write down what you are being invited to do.

MY TURN:

I’ve read this story many times, and I admit that I always feel a little bit guilty at how satisfying it is to see Haman get his come-uppance.  But this time, the word that stood out to me was “Monstrous.”  I know God’s timing is not my timing, so things happen with him when they are supposed to happen to achieve His greatest Glory.  The problem that has created for me, at times, however, is that sometimes it can look like God does not really look at injustice as monstrous.  Most times what it ends up looking like, to me, is like He’s choosing to ignore my pleas for justice because it isn’t delivered as swiftly as I’d like, or according to my terms.  From there, it’s all too easy for The Enemy to get his foot in the door and start with his lies about how this apparent unwillingness on the part of God to answer my prayers must mean that He doesn’t really care about me as much as the Bible would lead me to believe; that, maybe, the Bible is true for everyone but me.

What do you think?  Is it just possible, then, that this is why we are cautioned to take captive every thought, holding it up to the light of scripture to see if it holds true, so that we can demolish every argument that sets itself up against the knowledge of scriptures (2 Corinthians 10:5)?

I know I’ve spent a lot of time since April 2011 wondering just how much God really cares about the injustices that have happened to me and my family.  I’ve come to this conclusion.  Because we live in a fallen world, injustices are going to happen.  The world is full of people who just want what they want.  Most of the time, it’s nothing person when they get what they want at the expense of someone else.  Most of the time, they simply were not thinking about how their actions would affect anyone else.  One thing I’ve always known, but have finally started to truly plumb the depths of is the idea that there is nothing I can do that will have NO impact on somebody else (well, except for choosing which pair of socks I’m going to wear today).  We were created to be in relationships.  As a result, everything we do will have an effect on someone else, because it can’t NOT.  And though I might have to play some weird, far-fetched game of “Six Degrees of Separation” to be able to figure out exactly how or if George Clooney’s recent marriage has affected my life, if it has at all, God already knows it.  In fact, He would have anticipated it.  My part:  to come alongside Him, in agreement, and allow Him to do in my life whatever it is He is needs to do in my.

Years ago, when I read the story of Esther, I had a hard time wrapping my head around the idea that Esther was put on this Earth at precisely the time she was because the job she had to do was hers to do.  I figured:  Anyone could do that job.  Why would Mordecai say that perhaps she was put there for such a time as this?  It could’ve been any other Hebrew girl.  While it’s true that God could’ve chosen anybody to play this role, He chose Esther.  That’s all that matters.  Though he could’ve picked anyone to walk the path that I’m walking (and several people have walked a similar path before me), He chose me for this and this for me.  So, for such a time as this, I have been created.  I need to trust that God knew what he was doing and that He knows what He is doing.  He has a plan.  All I have to do is let Him work it and be available when He calls me.  The injustice that has occurred to me and my family:  I’ll let Him worry about that until He shows me the next step.